Like The Rain
If you’ve read some of my other articles, you know that I’ve always dreamed of being a writer. Writing the Fear Not column for the Held in the Heart Journal has been ground-breaking for me in realizing that dream. What I haven’t said in those articles was I wanted to be a fictional romance writer. In order to continue to break free from my chains of fear, this month I’m stepping completely out of my comfort zone and sharing some creative writing with you all. So, put on your comfy clothes, pour yourself a glass of wine if you are so inclined, and curl up in your favorite reading space for this short little story.
Like the Rain
Standing on the covered front porch of the little white cottage she listened to the thunder rumbling in the background and rain’s steady downpour overhead. She was mesmerized by the huge silver colored drops hitting the whitewashed picket fence. Suddenly, she couldn’t resist the urge to rush out into the muddy drive.
Water running tiny little rivers over her feet and in between her toes, looking heavenward she closed her eyes and tilted her head back. Her tongue darted out to catch the rain drops on its tip. They tickled her tongue and she giggled. Unhurriedly she stretched her arms out in front of her, slowly spreading them wide, her palms facing upward she began twirling around in a slow sensuous circle. The rain pounded her body like a lover’s perfect rhythm causing gooseflesh to appear on her arms. The thunder rumbled loud and low in the distance and she inhaled deeply, the scent of sweet pea and honeysuckle in the moist air. Within minutes her white blouse and grey skirt were plastered to her skin, leaving nothing to the imagination.
This is how he found her. He had left her months ago brokenhearted and battered by his very own cruel words. He couldn’t move, in awe of the creature before him. Smiling, abandoning herself to the elements, like she used to abandon herself to him. If it was possible, she was more beautiful now than he imagined her in his mind all these months, longing to see her and aching to hold her. He would remember touching her, caressing her until she was purring just for him. Every curve outlined under the soaking wet clothes made him suck in his breath sharply. He was instantly rock hard at seeing her pert breasts and dark, hard nipples straining against the tight fabric just begging to be touched. He shook his wet head as if to clear the cobwebs. This beautiful creature loved him once and though he was not a praying sort of man, he prayed to God he had not killed every ounce of love she had for him.
The thought of her in his arms was the only thing that kept him going during the last few weeks.
He had never in his life experienced such a hell as he had then. When he thought he would break and it was the end, he realized then, he couldn’t live without her. Two souls such as theirs could not spend their lives apart chasing dreams they would never realize unless they were together. Their bond could not be severed with neither time nor space, or so he hoped. So, with it as his only hope of ever surviving, he traveled back to their special place on a gut feeling she would be there.
Part of him still unbelieving she was standing in front of him in the pouring summer rain. He wasn’t sure if she was real or an apparition of his own mind. He had seen her in the throes of passion looking much like she did at this very moment and he was scared. Was she as happy without him now, as she had been with him? Questions plagued his mind as he stood unmoving, watching, totally immobilized.
Smiling to herself she slowed her twirling down to concentrate on the feel of the rain on her skin. It stung, almost painful yet at the same time soul-cleansing, which made her smile. She hadn’t felt this good in ages. She felt alive, not the dead shell she had been for the past several months. She discovered this cozy cottage for rent earlier in the year. It was tucked in the woods off the beaten path, surrounded by all God’s natural beauty. Trees of every variety surrounded the property and provided a secluded setting for two lovers where they could disappear and never be found if they chose. All types of wild bushes and flowers, raspberry, honeysuckle, sweet pea just to name a few, could be found on the property. A babbling brook, which ran into a small pond fed by an underground spring, lay a short walk from the cottage itself.
It was here amongst nature at its finest she thought she discovered herself, her love & her life.
Yet, after a few short months her world of blissful happiness came to a crashing end. Pain she had never known and hoped to never endure again paralyzed her. She thought he was her soulmate. The one in which all of eternity she kept meeting, in this life and the last and the next to come. But it was not meant to be. The pure ethereal love they shared for those few months was nothing but a lie on his part. He was a fake and a liar all wrapped up in a dream. Sometimes she would swear none of it happened nor was real, but it was, and her heart bore the scars to prove it.
Nearly a month ago, she received a notice from the elderly couple she rented the cottage from telling her they were going to sell it and asking if she wanted to buy it. Her first reaction was not in a million years would she ever buy the place. Why on earth would she want that reminder of all she had loved and lost? The pain would be too much to bear. Thankfully she hadn’t answered the letter immediately, but put it aside and came across it again later that week as she was re-sorting mail to pay bills.
This time when she read the notice her gut instinct was that she had to keep it. This time the memories came crashing back with a ferocity which startled her. Not the pain, but the love. She felt the oneness, the completeness, fulfillment, the feeling of total contentment, not to mention the passion which was always a constant in their relationship. She remembered the feelings well, one breath, one touch, one taste. She smiled through the tears and asked herself, honestly, how can I not buy the place where I’d never been happier in all my life?
She would always remember him with love and pain, but never with hate.
If she was honest with herself, she saw him in everything. There was nothing the eyes could see which didn’t remind her in some way of him. He taught her to see beauty in everything. Even in pain. No matter how painful it had been in the end, her life had changed, irrevocably forever and in all ways good except one, she was alone and would never again feel completely alive. Decision reached, she quickly penned a letter back telling them she would buy the property.
And that was how she came to be at the cottage, now her cottage, her own piece of heaven on earth twirling like a child in the pouring down rain…thunderstorm, no less. The rain had slackened to a gentle steady shower now. Ah, the rain… she had a soft spot in her heart for the thunderstorms but even more so at the cottage.
Their first time here they got caught, out exploring the property near the pond. Instead of running for shelter they both stood in the rain letting it wash over them, cleansing their bodies. Staring deeply into each other’s eyes, his luminescent hazel and hers, chocolate brown, they seemed to gaze into each other’s souls. No words were needed. They spoke to each other through their eyes, all knowing, all seeing. His large warm hand gently caressed her cheek. His touch sent lightening jolts straight to her heart.
She smiled, a slow and sensuous smile. He bent his head closer, capturing her lips with his. Steam could surely be seen gently wafting from their bodies. Hair slicked to their heads; clothes plastered to their bodies like form fitting gloves. They were both a sight to see, but nothing mattered at that moment. Nothing mattered except each other, locked in a lover’s embrace that felt like they had known each other forever.
That day, time stood still.
It was then he felt it… the same memories gently rushing over him, warming him from head to toe. He felt her, their hearts beating to the rhythm of the rain, as one. She was not an apparition, as he had been beginning to think. She was remembering that moment, standing there with her eyes closed, arms open wide, soul bared to the sky, her love for him pouring from the very essence of her being.
She felt the prickle of gooseflesh rising on her arms and a shudder reverberated through her entire body. She knew it wasn’t because she was cold. She felt him. Felt him nearby. She always knew when he was near. It was like a sixth sense she had. Like the dreams where she knew he was hurt, yet there was nothing she could do to help him. Her heart hammered in her chest, unchecked emotions swelling quickly and violently. She stopped twirling, dropping her hands to her sides helplessly.
He saw her shudder. He knew at that precise moment his presence had been discovered. He looked around for a fleeting moment. Any thoughts of fleeing now were now too late to act on. He had a matter of seconds to decide what to do. He had planned out just about every possible scene in his mind over the past few weeks. But seeing her standing in the rain, smiling, twirling like a graceful dancer was not one of them. Uprooting himself from where he had been standing, taking in the scene, her in all her gloriously wet beauty, he took a step forward and then another.
She couldn’t name all the emotions she was feeling rolling over her. She only knew she needed to open her eyes and he would be standing there close-by. My God, what was she going to do after all these months? She couldn’t wait another second, her eyes fluttered open, raindrops falling from her lashes. When his form came into her line of site, an unexpected sob burst forth. Was it shock? Was it pain? Was it anger? Was it happiness? The look on his face was crestfallen. He slowly started to lower his head in defeat and changed his mind. This woman, this beautiful butterfly standing in front of him was his life’s blood and he was not going to go down without a fight. He saw her lower lip tremble, she bit down on it hard.
“Is that r-really you? A-are you really here,” she managed to stammer out. “Or have I completely lost my mind?” She tossed her head a moment, took in a long, ragged breath closing her eyes then opening them. He was still standing there, a few feet away, yet it seemed like miles. “W-what…” was all she managed to get out this time as the floodgates opened, tears streaming down her face. “Y-you said you were n-never coming back…” He could feel her pain ripping through his chest like a knife, though he felt it more strongly and severely than he did when he left. He had half laughed at her and her talk of souls and spirits and connections and forever. He had told her things to make her hate him, but beneath that pain, he could also feel the love that she was trying to hide.
“I was wrong.” He stated clearly and plainly.
“I was wrong, dead-wrong. I should have never left you. I should have never hurt you the way I did. I am sorry, so sorry. Can you ever forgive me?” he confessed, eyes bright with unshed tears. She stood, unmoving. He could feel the torment inside her and he prayed that her soul would win out in the internal war she was fighting. She had made him into a believer. If not for her, he would be in a grave back in that desolate city in Texas right now. Her soul is what kept him holding onto sanity and not slip into the dark death. He waited. He would give her all the time she needed.
The rain had stopped and the sun was peering high in the sky over the trees. Water glistened on everything it had touched. Steam was rising from the pond where the cool rainwater had mixed with the warm pond.
“I was there, you know.” She finally stated so softly, he almost hadn’t heard her.
“I know.” He agreed.
“You know?” she questioned; eyebrows raised.
“I know. You saved me from sure death that day. I know it was you. I know we were meant to be together… in this life and before… in this life and the next. Forever, for eternity, I know…” he sighed, long and heavily, as if a huge weight had been lifted from his soul.
“You know.” She stated plainly, her lips curving into a smile, tears running unchecked down her cheeks. She took a faltering step towards him. That was all it took. He closed the gap between them in a matter of seconds gathering her in his arms and holding her tightly so she couldn’t fly away. Was he dreaming? Was she really going to forgive him? Hope blossomed in his chest.
“I love you,” she breathed breathlessly. “But then, you already know that. “I love you now, I loved you then, I will love you forever, for an eternity.” The tears flowed silently in joy down his cheeks.
Never in his life would he ever doubt again.
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(She/Her)
The gal behind Held In The Heart. The Community Journal is a space for those who feel deeply to express freely. We explore all sorts of things here, from the real & raw healing stories & creative writing, to the funny & fleeting moments of everyday human life. I warmly welcome you and invite you to explore with us!